I don't believe space exists. You're not gonna put a camera on a roomba, stick it in the desert, and tell me it's Mars.

Now remember kids if anyone ever offers you drugs say 'Thank you' cause drugs are very expensive.

Stop saying you're not racist because you have a friend that's black. That's like saying you're not a pedophile because you have a friend that's a kid.

I have voices in my head, but they're all speaking Spanish, and I have NO idea what they're saying.

I'll tell you what's better than watching the sunrise... Sleeping through it.

I dated a teacher in high school. Yeah, it didn't make me cooler. And a lot of you are like 'that's cause you were homeschooled'.

Girls say it's hard to find nice guys. It's actually really easy. It's just all nice guys are ugly.

The flat-brimmed cap is the modern day dunce cap.

They say money doesn't buy happiness. That phrase should end with 'just kidding'.

Being an ugly woman is like being a man. You're gonna have to work. Yep.

I do think we can be a little less PC when it comes to sports, though. Just once I want to hear an announcer go 'God, black people are fast. Holy cow! All of them. They're fast. Back to you Bob.'

I need this wild life, this freedom.

The image of God infused in us never sees the light of day in the service of self, but it becomes the light of day in the service of others.

Beauty is unbearable drives us to despair offering us for a minute the glimpse of an eternity that we should like to stretch out over the whole of time.

People are worms, and even the God who created them is immensely bored with their antics.

Being able to improvise is the basis for creating all characters and situations, for everything to do with performing, really. And it's good therapy as well.

In fact, scientists have shown that the better your DNA, your genetic machinery is at healing itself, the longer you live. That's how meditation lowers biological age.

And what is so rare as a day in June? Then, if ever, come perfect days.

Obama has been the single worst president in modern American history in dealing with the Israeli-Palestinian conflict.

Hollywood is a suction for your confidence or your faith or your togetherness. Just walking on the street you can feel it.

I obtain great satisfaction out of using my intellect.