I don't have false teeth. Do you think I'd buy teeth like these?

Only I can change my life. No one can do it for me.

When you have a dream, you've got to grab it and never let go.

Before you go to bed, write down three 'gratefuls' for the day and three 'did wells' (they can even include something as simple as doing the laundry)-the results can be amazing!

It's almost impossible to be funnier than the people in Washington.

You have to have faith that there is a reason you go through certain things. I can't say I'm glad to go through pain, but in a way one must, in order to gain courage and really feel joy.

If someone tells you that you cannot do something and you believe it, they are right.

It's also selfish because it makes you feel good when you help others. I've been helped by acts of kindness from strangers. That's why we're here, after all, to help others.

It costs a lot to sue a magazine, and it's too bad that we don't have a system where the losing team has to pay the winning team's lawyers.

No one ever said life was fair. Just Eventful.

Comedy is tragedy plus time.

As important as it is to work very hard on your dream, it is even more important to ensure that you are working with the right plan.

When we think we can manage our time, our circumstances, and our relationships without His help and inspiration, we know what unmanageability is.

Don't be afraid to question. Don't be afraid to get fired. Don't be afraid to be wrong.

Control your thoughts. Decide about that which you will think and concentrate upon. You are in charge of your life to the degree you take charge of your thoughts.

Good manners will often take people where neither money nor education will take them.

...and rout the magical mystical moonlight with fierce proof of its own greater power to light, to heat, to make everything known.

Fame is a fickle friend, Harry. Celebrity is as celebrity does. Remember that.

Be childish. Be irresponsible. Be disrespectful. Be everything this society hates.

Latin women are very comfortable with their bodies and their sexuality. We aren't afraid to show that off a little bit more.