I don't know what it would be like to actually play guitar. I've toured with a lot of comedians and it's never been like it is for a rock band.

I don't have a kid, but I think that I would be a good father, especially if my baby liked to go out drinking.

I don't speak French, but I took it for five years growing up. So, if I were in a situation where I had to be, like, 'Excuse me, pineapple dog house red, what time is it library?' - no problem.

If no one figures out you are pretending to be retarded, your life will be greeted with treasure.

A lot of people think that kids say the darnedest things. But so would you if you had no education. You'd just be like, I am bike cheese. Because you wouldn't know what words were.

What do you think you should do if you're attacked by a bear? Play dead? No - that's a lie promoted by the bears.

What I think you should do is imagine people in their underwear but then also imagine them crying, and that - that is truly relaxing.

Marriage is when two people love each other so much that they promise that if they ever, ever stop they'll fill out tons of paperwork.

Why is no one talking about all the potential savings from a complete economic collapse?

If things are really overwhelming and you need to talk, you can give me a call at 347-273-2044.

In America, Qualification is simply an attitude. I've adopted it. So, yes. I am qualified.

The real world—where I probably could never be happy, and never get anywhere.

i am open + free to create in abundance. i am deserving of my own love + it comes in the form of art.

Sunshine is a light.May the sunshine brighten your path of life.

In love's God-like breathing, there's the innermost aspect of the universe.

If you're on Twitter, what you're saying is, 'I'm important enough for you to care what I think.'

I've been arrested a few times, but I've never been in real trouble. Because what I do is art and even if it is illegal, Art is a universal activity, and artists are generally respected.

It's nice to be nice to the nice.

I want my movies to be commercial, fun thrill rides but I also want them to have substance to them. The fun part is knowing how to roll up your sleeves and get it done.

Man is a Creature of a wilful Head, And hardly driven is, but eas'ly led.

Evolution is the most popular way we have for dealing with change.