I don't know who the hell Paul Lynde is, or why he's funny, and I prefer it to be a mystery to me.

I sang in the choir for years, even though my family belonged to another church.

Peter Marshall: A western saddle has a curved horn on the front to hold something for the cowboy. What is it?

Sandwiches are wonderful. You don't need a spoon or a plate!

My father was adamant in his disapproval of my interest in show business.

A closet full of wire hangers can be the most dangerous place in the world.

Food was a constant topic of conversation in our household.

I'm Liberace without a piano.

I often go on a liquid fast a couple of days a week. I never take just water. Instead, I'll have maybe six glasses of vegetable and fruit juices a day.

I can't even get three weeks off to have cosmetic surgery.

When I said I didn't have a cent, I didn't. I used to get annoyed with people who said they were broke when they had five dollars.

You can keep your willpower, Frog. I am going home to bake a cake.

Oh, that fighting for peace is like screwing for virginity.

His voice was the most obnoxious squeak I ever was tormented with.

Official truths are often powerful illusions.

Assurance and intrepidity, under the white banner of seeming modesty, clear the way for merit, that would otherwise be discouraged by difficulties...

International incidents must not be allowed to shape foreign policy, foreign policy must shape the incidents.

I was frightened to go forward, but I was even more frightened of going back.

I've got to love the souls of people. Because I can't love every incarnation. To love their souls, I have to identify with my own soul.

It is the fine excesses of life that make it worth living.

I'd say he's done more than that.