I don't like people cleaning my room.

Anyone can be confident with a full head of hair. But a confident bald man - there's your diamond in the rough.

Even though the National Guard and Army Reserve see combat today, it rankles me that people assume it was some kind of waltz in the park back then.

Being Larry David on Curb Your Enthusiasm was the best thing to happen to Larry David in life.

Give a guy a girlfriend and a great job, he doesn’t need therapy.

I’d rather have the thieves than the neighbors - the thieves don't impose. Thieves just want your things, neighbors want your time.

Women love a self-confident bald man.

Sometimes you have to wander a bit, and do what you don't want to in order to figure out what it is you're supposed to do.

Switzerland is a place where they don't like to fight, so they get people to do their fighting for them while they ski and eat chocolate.

I had a job as a paralegal. I drove a cab.

A date is an experience you have with another person that makes you appreciate being alone

You were my marital bliss, ” he said to me this morning. “You can be again!” You know what I answered? “A marital blister, that’s what we’ll have if I stay.

This helpful war. It makes us better people and then it tries to kill us.

My days are filled with you, and for that I am more grateful than you could ever know

the distinction between rich nations and poor nations is one of the great dominant political and international themes of our century.

When Fidel Castro is gone, there will be hope for Cuba. There will be opportunity for Cuba.

Both dreams and myths are important communications from ourselves to ourselves.

One important thing to know is you're still the same person during it. I'm more eager than ever to do what I did. I want to do everything.

Women are much smarter then men and often are much more political creatures, so they can have the ability to manipulate men, particularly on a boat.

Crystals amplify the consciousness.

The sea is not less beautiful in our eyes because we know that sometimes ships are wrecked by it.