I don't need somebody behind a desk to tell me what a marketing survey says is funny. I got 3 million miles and 70, 000 tickets sold, telling me that I know how to make people laugh.

One of the most beautiful things in the world I've ever seen or heard is people laughing, even when there seems to be so little reason for them to laugh.

Black folks never bungie jump. That's too much like lynching for us. I'm gonna let you tie a rope around me and push me off a bridge? You must be out your damn mind.

There's something about having a great bottle of wine and a great cigar. Nothing compares to it.

No matter how bad things are, you can at least be happy that you woke up this morning. D.

I'm not gonna lie, I love the holidays. But Christmas was a lot more fun when you weren't paying for it.

I used to always run off at the mouth and talk about people. I just didn't know that it would make a living for me.

They didn't have to describe Jesus to me for me to know he's black. Jesus' first miracle was turning water into wine at a wedding. Now if that ain't black folk, I don't know what is.

With a cigar like in life, you got to have some length, and some girth.

Every group has its idiosyncrasies, but at a certain point we all are human.

The one thing women love more than money is power.

A safe army is better than a safe border

Sometimes all you need to do is just hold on to yourself! Look at the stars in the sky, listen to the sweet murmurings of the breeze, inhale the fragrance of the night, and you will feel fine!

So such is life that it writes itself, trying to right itself, but there's nothing wrong with it.

This is the case with thousands: they appear desirous of knowing the truth, but have not patience to wait in a proper way to receive an answer to their question.

My brother and I are always trying to figure out a way to work again together.

I go to bed late. My mind starts going at night - that's when those creative juices begin flowing.

Many people assume that they can probably find many ways to save time. This is an incorrect assumption for it is only when you focus on spending time that you begin to use your time effectively.

It turns out Dimitri had a friend, who had a friend, and despite the best security in the Moroi world, we managed to get into the Court's prison facilities.

The brown monkey's instinct to kill is correct; such men are dangerous to all monkey customs.

If we really want to pray we must first learn to listen, for in the silence of the heart God speaks.