I don't suffer fools, and I like to see fools suffer.

A home without a grandmother is like an egg without salt.

If you ever meet someone who cannot understand why solitary confinement is considered punishment, you have met a misanthrope.

I simply like guns because you can't shoot people without them.

I wasn't used to children and they were getting on my nerves. Worse, it appeared that I was a child, too. I hadn't known that before; I thought I was just short.

Writers who have nothing to say always strain for metaphors to say it in.

If we define a misanthrope as 'someone who does not suffer fools and likes to see fools suffer,' we have described a person with something to look forward to.

The more immoral we become in big ways, the more puritanical we become in little ways.

God may have loved the common people, but a trip to any shopping mall suggests that He made far too many of them.

Golf is an exercise in Scottish pointlessness for people who are no longer able to throw telephone poles at each other.

Democracy is the fig leaf of elitism.

Each of us must pay for the slightest damage he inflicts upon a universe created for indifference and stagnation, sooner or later, he will regret not having left it intact.

I never lose in any argument, because I always make sure that my opponent wins.

Those who are called by God are predestined for victory

Every dog, we are told, has his day, unless there are more dogs than days.

I always have said that the most valuable thing I have isn't money; it's my time.

Good design is being able to put a $100,000 thing next to a $20 thing. If it looks right and it works then it works. It doesn't have to be expensive; it's all about the high meets low for me.

You ask if we shall know our friends in heaven. - Do you suppose we are greater fools there than here?

All responsible writers, to some degree, have become involuntary criers of doom, because doom is in the wind

Let yourself become that space that welcomes any experience without judgement.