I don't think I've drunk enough beer to understand that.

There's a saying that all roads lead to Ankh-Morpork. And it's wrong. All roads lead away from Ankh-Morpork, but sometimes people just walk along them the wrong way.

The worst thing you can do is nothing.

There are times in life when people must know when not to let go. Balloons are designed to teach small children this.

Rincewind had always been happy to think of himself as a racist. The One Hundred Meters, the Mile, the Marathon -- he'd run them all.

Rincewind could scream for mercy in nineteen languages, and just scream in another forty-four.

Tourist, Rincewind decided, meant ‘idiot.

...and the funny thing was that people who weren't entirely certain they were right always argued much louder than other people, as if the main person they were trying to convince were themselves.

The trouble with having an open mind, of course, is that people will insist on coming along and trying to put things in it.

I have, before now, waited for a pen to perform a macro.

You never knew about people, like you never knew how deep a pond was because all you saw was the top.

A good life is doing what you love as much as you can and doing what you must as much as you should

I'm a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn't have the heart to let him down.

I would feel much better about this whole affair if you would slap me and get it over with. I know you want to.

It is in Saudi Arabia's best interest to allow women to fully participate in its society, and this includes the right to vote and run for office.

The United States Congress, acting with large bipartisan majorities, at the urging of the President, enacted as the law of the land that all children are to be above average.

Much of our poetry has the very best manners, but no character.

We're not just horror fans. We're film fans. I love action films. I want to do action films. I want to do romantic comedies. I love all this stuff. So, if I find the good material, I'll do it.

We need to make sure that leaks of classified information, of national security secrets, needs to be rigorously pursued and prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law.

Flowers open every night across the sky, a breathing peace, and sudden flame catching.

A vision on its own is not enough. Hard work and dedication is required to make that vision a reality.