I don't write comedy. I write drama that's funny.

Sometimes standing up for what you believe means standing down and allowing the universe to do its work.

Politicians study hard and work diligently their entire lives to be able to stand in front of a national audience and lie through their teeth.

The bigger the words the weaker the voice.

To find meaning in our lives we need consistent exposure to kids, elders and animals... cuz kids and animals aren't looking for it, and elders are the closest to finding it.

I love cheetahs. Every moment of every day is spent in fear of dying a terrible death yet they always carry themselves elegantly, remain loyal to their family, and never complain about anything.

I wish dogs understood: 'We're going in five minutes.

Talent is being unabashedly and unapologetically fearless in the work that you do. The only difference between having talent and not having talent is fear.

Stupidity is actually in a way the mark of intelligence - if you're not doing stupid things that defy logic you're probably not taking enough risks.

Out of all the medical advancements in human history I'm still most in awe of that tiny little piece of toilet paper that can stop a gushing razor cut in its tracks.

What I love about New York: the faster and more recklessly my cab driver drives the safer and all around better I feel.

Do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?

When a husband and wife are concerned only about their own individual desires, the stage is set for conflict.

Forget yesterday, Act on Today and Get a hold on tomorrow.

Country music especially can get very formulaic - you know, you have to have your verses and a bridge and a chorus, and a lot of the songs are written as just plain and simple poetry on the road.

Reputation is like fine china: Once broken it's very hard to repair.

I claim the right to contradict myself. I don't want to deprive myself of the right to talk nonsense, and I ask humbly to be allowed to be wrong sometimes.

He was one of those guys who'd pronounce I'm a hugger as he came at you, neglecting to ask if the feeling was mutual.

We are human beings, not ants.

If I could take my entire savings in place of something, I’d chose time.

We've got a responsibility to live up to the legacy of those who came before us by doing all that we can to help those who come after us.