I dont fear death so much as I fear its prologues: loneliness, decrepitude, pain, debilitation, depression, senility. After a few years of those, I imagine death presents like a holiday at the beach.

You are a person and then you cease to be a person, and a cadaver takes your place.

I began thinking about my skeleton, this solid, beautiful thing inside me that I would never see.

Instead, I quietly excused myself and went to the bar, to commune with spirits I know how to relate to.

The suffix 'naut' comes from the Greek and Latin words for ships and sailing. Astronaut suggests 'a sailor in space.' Chimponaut suggests 'a chimpanzee in sailor pants'.

All the clothes in my closet are Oakland, California, clothes. You can't wear those anywhere else. The barometric pressure drops and then where are you?

Bodily fluids and solids are universally the most disgusting things we as human beings can come upon, but as long as they are inside us, it's part of you.

Sexual desire is a state not unlike hunger.

Many people will find this book disrespectful. There is nothing amusing about being dead, they will say. Ah, but there is.

Gravity disappears again, and we rise up off the floor like spooks from a grave. It's like the Rapture in here every thirty seconds.

The simplest strategy for bouts of noxious flatus is to not care. Or perhaps to take advantage of a gastroenterologist I know: get a dog. (To blame.)

Compromising is the only path that all happy couples travel on.

Marriage, by making us more contented, causes us often to be less enterprising.

Of all the errands life seems to be running, of all the mysteries that enchant us, love is my favorite

Once the subconscious mind accepts an idea, it begins to execute it.

Time for some thrillin' heroics.

Recovering in a Calcutta, India hospital. I think I'm more difficult than critical.

The legal tender quality [of money] is only valuable for the purposes of dishonesty.

There's good and bad in every arena. It's funny, some people, the reason they're in the underground is because they're lazy and don't make things happen for themselves.

To me happiness, true happiness is when you can really dance with sad.

Globalisation has in effect made the citizen disappear, and it has reduced the state into being a mere instrument of global capital.