I eat meat because meat tastes like murder, and murder tastes pretty dam good!

Racism isn't born, folks, it's taught. I have a two-year-old son. You know what he hates? Naps! End of list.

I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country and call it Irate. All the pissed off people live in one place and get it over with.

Life Sucks,get a helmet

You know why the French hate us so much? Thay gave us the croissant. And you know what we did with it? We turned it into our croissandwich, thank you very much.

Why hate someone for the color of their skin when there are much better reasons to hate them?

Crisis doesn't create character; it reveals it.

Ann Romney talking about middle class moms is like Chris Christie talking about a salad

There we were in the middle of a sexual revolution wearing clothes that guaranteed we wouldn't get laid.

I'm really happy I went to a Catholic school because a lot of the repressive tactics they use make for great senses of humor.

What firefighters, and people in our military and cops do is separate from what the rest of us do, basically these people say "I'm going to protect all these strangers."

Holding on and getting attached is sadness. Letting go with love opens the heart to fill it with happiness.

We can flourish and be fruitful by God’s grace.

I think, with never-ending gratitude, that the young women of today do not and can never know at what price their right to free speech and to speak at all in public has been earned.

Financial institutions make us nervous when they're trying to do well.

A refrigerator runs by converting the dust behind it into a peculiar mutant, reptilian substance.

The attributes of a great lady may still be found in the rule of the four S's: Sincerity, Simplicity, Sympathy, and Serenity.

I'm an anglophile. I visit England regularly, sometimes three or four times a year, at least once a year.

Who needs make-believe monsters when there are so many real ones.

Government is essentially the negation of liberty.

I've recommended girls for jobs that I had a different part in, and agents have been like, "No, don't ..."It's so surprising to me.