I enjoy the oohs! and aahs! from the gallery when I hit my drives. But I'm getting pretty tired of the awws! and uhhs! when I miss the putt.

I believe nicotine plus caffeine equals protein.

I don't think I've ever stepped into a gym - they won't let me smoke there. I just thank God Miller Lite isn't as fattening as most beers. If I cut back on beer, though, I'd look anorexic.

I was never able to have three of four beers. One's too many, and ten just ain't enough. Basically it's the way I've been since high school.

I hit the ball as hard as I can. If I can find it, I hit it again.

Life is nothing but a memory. People who dwell on the bad ones aren't going to have a whole lot of good ones coming up.

This fitness thing is blown out of proportion. What am I going to do on a treadmill - smoke a cigarette and drink a diet Coke?

There are probably some things I could do to keep my flexibility up, but I'd rather smoke, drink diet Cokes and eat.

My slogan is who needs fitness when you've got great equipment.

I learned you can't drink whiskey and play golf.

Do I have to know rules and all that crap? Then forget it.

Love is the only way to go toward happiness.

And anything that might hurt me would just make me stronger in the end.

The same thinking and actions that created our problems cannot be used to solve them.

Diplomacy - the art of jumping into trouble without making a splash.

There will be fiscal issues that are appropriate to discuss.

All those moments, those memories. Everything that we are, compressed in just two or three kilos of paper — the weight of a human heart.

I couldnt imagine something asking as much of me as House Of Cards. Its a great warm-up for coming back to the screen.

If you are willing to reflect on the courage and moderation of other people, you will find them strange.

We were talking briefly about cocaine... yeah. Anything that makes you paranoid and impotent, give me more of that!

If you have nothing to say for yourself then kindly keep your mouth shut!