I failed to make the chess team because of my height.

Life doesn't imitate art, it imitates bad television.

If you want to make God laugh, tell him about your plans.

My one regret in life is that I am not someone else.

Life is full of misery, loneliness, and suffering - and it's all over much too soon.

You rely too much on brain. The brain is the most overrated organ.

Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons.

All people know the same truth. Our lives consist of how we choose to distort it.

Honey! Bring down a copy of my will - and an eraser!

To you, I'm an atheist.To God, I'm the loyal opposition.

God is silent. Now if only man would shut up.

Why do people always assume that volume will succeed when logic won’t? - Damon

Mind and soul both exists in thoughts. Then how can you call them separate.

Be you. You are a holy-self.

You know some minutes warn you they're going to be mighty short and you'd better take a snapshot of 'em while you can. ("Golden Baby")

A man is angry at a libel because it is false, but at a satire because it is true.

Everyone messes up in relationships and has peaks and valleys in their personal lives. When I realized it wasn't the end of the world and I would keep on standing, I knew it was going to be OK.

I just know there's an albino living in the colored quarters. I can feel it in my bones.

Men are committing the rapes. Let them be put under curfew.

There's a real sense of fighting and destruction in our DNA that we don't get in touch with.

Satan probably wouldn't have talked so big if God had been his wife.