I feel sorry for people who don't drink or do drugs. Because someday they're going to be in a hospital bed, dying, and they won't know why.

Beauty may be skin deep, but ugly goes clear to the bone.

Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing.

Music played a large role in the survival of the black people in America — that and a sense of humor that just couldn't be enslaved.

A girl's legs are her best friends...but even the best of friends must part.

This is the big one! You hear that, Elizabeth? I'm coming to join ya, honey!

What's the difference between a pickpocket and a peeping tom? A pickpocket snatches watches.

If you can see the handwriting on the wall... you're on the toilet.

The definition of indecent – when it’s in long, and it’s in hard, and it’s in deep – it’s in decent.

I carry a knife now because I read in a white magazine that all black people carry knives. So I rushed out and bought me one.

I ain't from Africa. I'm from St. Louis.

Success is messy. But so is life. Deal with it. Poverty is messier.

It is real hard work that will release your potential.

Doesn't matter where you go, home is uphill

God begins to paint the clouds in the eastern sky when the mountains butterflies come flying home

When nothing is at stake, everything's a waste.

Time is a dressmaker specializing in alterations.

Unless something real cool comes along, I will probably be doing features, so long as I can make a living doing that. Otherwise, I will do another show.

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.

Many of us would never have tried psychedelics if it weren't for Leary's popularizing them.

Teach your parents well.