I feel the need to scream, and even if the scream is not answered, I find my sanity in the echo.

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

The Bible teaches that we are to be patient in suffering. Tears become telescopes to heaven, bringing eternity a little closer.

By heaven we understand a state of happiness infinite in degree, and endless in duration.

I think there's only one sensible place for a person to be at 5:30 in the morning. That's in bed. And what am I doing? I'm out running. And I completely hate this.

I've lived most people's dream by playing football.

Play is the answer to how anything new comes about.

One thing that will make you quit smoking is sitting across from Keith Richards all night. I don't mind being ugly, but I sure don't want to look like that.

You can't run game on a rapper. I'm always 10 steps ahead of you.

Only after Realization you are connected with reality.

We are all united by the phenomenon that we have a body and that body is universally the same, more or less. If we lose sight of that perspective, everything can desperately suffer.

Treasures and armies do not make a king. A true king is a king within himself.