I figured if Allah had wanted us up that early, He wouldn't have invented noon.

I looked at myself in the mirror. I looked awful, but I always look awful in the mirror. I keep myself going with the firm belief that my real face is much better looking.

Various Horsemen are abroad, doing their various Apocalyptic things.

Premature burial works just fine as a cure for adolescence.

Jesus, what a nuisance it was, being desperate to stay alive.

The two women looked at me as if I were the Messiah returning with their personal salvations sealed in separate envelopes.

The longer I observe the way people really act, the happier I am that I never pay attention to them.

Something of greater import, I think, is to say I’m blessed in infinitely many ways. But sometimes I just don’t see it.

Character is that which can do without success.

The rich man who gives to the poor does not bestow alms but pays a debt.

I don't want to get away with murder! I'd have to live with that for the rest of my life. I would never want to live with killing somebody.

The only thing Hillary Clinton has going for herself is the press, without the press, she is absolutely zero.

The only impregnable citadel of virtue is religion; for there is no bulwark of mere morality, which some temptation may not overtop or undermine, and destroy.

To say of men that they are bad is to say they are worse than we think we are, or worse than the ideal man whose image we have built up on the basis of a certain few.

I am not ever in the business of making anyone feel bad.

I have so much respect for people that are my elders. You aren't going to hear me cursing around people that are 60 and 70 years old.

I might enjoy being an albatross, being able to glide for days and daydream for hundreds of miles along the thermals. And then being able to hang like an affliction round some people's necks.