I get a lot of big ideas, and occasionally I actually come up with one myself.

Alphabet: a symbolic system used in algebra, with applications that have yet to be discovered by dyslexics and two thirds of college graduates.

The idealist hopes. The romantic sees doom. The postmodernist sees doom and hopes.

The lampshade on my head is for my bright ideas. I won't be able to convey them until Monday, when my curtain gets out of the dry cleaners.

Pure joy is rare. That’s why for every meal I eat a really bloody steak.

Mom always said I was born to sit in the electric chair, but I'm proving her wrong. I'm going to die on my knees, begging for my life.

I bet there are a lot of women out there who want to sleep with a guy who reads. And being the head of the reading foundation, I’m very well endowed.

I love working with my hands. My writing is rough, my paper bruised with ink stains.

Night clubs are where Americans learn the laws of motion.

Education: learning to find your purpose. Upon finding your purpose: what did I learn?

If all women revealed their age, men would have nothing to hide from each other.

Just like the notion of "Internet natives", who have never known a world without Internet access, we, who have lived our entire lives with video games, can be known as "video game natives.

Man is a tireless traveller wandering in the dark valleys of his past!

Well, I make every song I sing personal. I've never chosen a song that wasn't.

I had a marvelously happy childhood.

A good film script should be able to do completely without dialogue.

They don't make you what you are, you do. You are what you choose to be.

Mulligan: invented by an Irishman who wanted to hit one more twenty yard grounder.

I do ballads that say what every man wants to say and that every woman wants to hear, or I do songs about social issues.

All ministry that is faithful & eventually fruitful finds its roots in the life, death, & resurrection of Jesus Christ.

Every man as well as every day has its lights and shades.