I giggle when I put myself down. It's just funny to me.

I was one of the first veejays to take the camera out on location, and that's what was unique about MTV at that time.

I kind of was raised at The Comedy Store by comedians. When you see my dad on stage before me and then you see me, you'll see where I got a lot of my stuff.

Serious and intense people, they drain you. But someone who's an idiot, like myself, they're fun. You either hate me or you love me.

Whenever someone dies everyone says, I love that guy, except for Jeffrey Dahmer.

I want to do an 'Extreme Makeover' show. You know that MTV show 'I Want To Have A Famous Face'? Well, I want to do a new show. I want to have a different famous face.

My mom is two people to me. She's my mom number one, and then she's this lady most comedians know as being a legendary owner of a nightclub that's responsible for starting a lot of heavy careers.

I liked Evel Knievel, and that game Mouse Trap. That was pretty cool.

Comedy wasn't something I chose - it chose me.

I'm not used to getting good reviews.

When you're a kid, all you really care about are Slurpees and Slip N Slide and riding your bike, and that's what I did.

The time is always right, just act.

But in the areas that matter most, a burst of energy and activity cannot reverse the consequences that accompany a season of neglect.

Where God takes such pains to teach, we ought to be at pains to learn.

I'm tired of people screaming about price and forgetting about the content.

Case in point: Take adversity and make it an asset.

To write a good love letter, you ought to begin without knowing what you mean to say, and to finish without knowing what you have written.

As someone who tried to be great. I don't know if one ever gets to greatness, but I've put in a good effort, and will continue to do so.

The best way to live / is to be like water / For water benefits all things / and goes against none of them.

Now go back and meet all those people who you think know everything. Convince yourself that they're right, because we all know everything, it's merely a question of believing.

Every award for me is important because it means a slap against militarism and fascism in Indonesia.