I go out to the kitchen to feed the dog, but that's about as much cooking as I do.

People forget the good that zoos do. If it weren't for zoos, we would have so many species that would be extinct today.

If the guy's a cutie, you've gotta tap that booty.

I'm a teenager trapped in an old body.

I may be a senior, but so what? I'm still hot.

Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment

Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on.

If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.

Get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep. 9 if you're ugly.

We didn’t have Facebook in my day, we had a phone book but you wouldn’t waste an afternoon on it

I don't know how people get so anti-something. Just mind your own business, take care of your own affairs, and don't worry about other people so much.

You do care. You care so much you feel as though you will bleed to death with the pain of it.

No young lady can be jastified in flling in love before the gentleman's love is declared

The little Road says Go The little House says Stay And oh it's bonny here at home But I must go away.

I want to say that probably 24 hours after I told CBS that I was stepping down at my 65th birthday, I was already regretting it. And I regretted it every day since.

Any time a little midget does something like this, you gotta give him a 10!.

Every new body of discovery is mathematical in form, because there is no other guidance we can have.

This,’ whispered the Doctor to Romana, ‘is going to be like trying to find a book about needles in a room full of books about haystacks.

We all eat two to six times a day. Why? Because we are supposed to, we are programmed to, we want to.

The highest problem of any art is to cause by appearance the illusion of a higher reality.

Where you have the most armed citizens in America, you have the lowest violent crime rate. Where you have the worst gun control, you have the highest crime rate.