I grew up on radio, not TV.

I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.

Money can't buy you happiness, but it can buy you a yacht big enough to pull up right alongside it.

I would just like to say that after all these years of heavy drinking, bright lights and late nights, I still don't need glasses. I drink right out of the bottle.

If you subtracted all of the great artists who never drank, who never went to excess, you wouldn't have any more art left. What kind of poem are you gonna get out of a glass of iced tea?

The perfect woman has an IQ of 150, wants to make love until 4 in the morning, then turns into a pizza!

When I die, sprinkle my ashes over the 80's.

I'm not conceited. Conceit is a fault and I have no faults.

Remember, life is just a game and no one gets out alive

If you want to split a bottle with a friend, then Sammy Hagar is your guy. If you want to split your friend with a bottle than give me a call.

If you put a Van Halen album in your record collection, it will melt all the rest of your records.

The dynamic nature of knowledge is reflected in human progress and technological achievements.

There is no logic in logics except an illogical logic.

We must choose. Be a child of the past with all its crudities and imperfections, its failures and defeats, or a child of the future, the future of symmetry and ultimate success.

I think when you're put into a completely different situation and environment, you really see who you are. You're not affected by what's around you. You are who you are.

His words sliced through my heart, cutting it into little pathetic pieces.

The inquiry leads us to that source, at once the essence of genius, of virtue, and of life, which we call Spontaneity or Instinct.

Once you become a vegan, the food of the world opens up to you.

If this depression stays with us, the loser Tuesday is going to be the winner.

Strong hearts and helpful hands are needed, and, fortunately, we have them in every part of our beloved country.