I guess my main influences are Jesus, rock n roll and ex-wives. In that order.

I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years.

I called a detox center - just to see how much it would cost: $13,000 for three weeks! My friends, if you can come up with thirteen grand, you don't have a problem yet.

There's no happy ending to cocaine. You either die, you go to jail, or else you run out.

Obviously I'm not a role model for impressionable youth.

Every generation has someone who steps outside the norm and offers a voice for the unspeakable attitudes of that time. I represent everything that's supposed to be wrong, everything that's forbidden.

It occurred to me that there wouldn't be world hunger, if you people would MOVE WHERE THE FOOD IS!!!

Real comedy doesn't just make people laugh and think, but makes them laugh and change.

If I get married again, I want a guy there with a drum to do rimshots during the vows.

Lick the alphabet. It makes you appear creative, it's an easy diagram to remember, it's like "aaaaa.... beeeee.... ceeee.

Folks, I've been straight for seventeen days... Not all in a row.

Thousands of young couples go through with a loveless marriage because no one ever told them what genuine love is. If people today knew that kind of love, the divorce rate would be sharply reduced.

You don’t need a Master’s in Theology to love people.

The road forgets. Make your life a journey, keep moving toward what you want, leave behind anything that's too heavy to carry.

A finished person is a boring person.

Either we heal now, as a team, or we will die as individuals.

The health of soil, plant, animal and man is one and indivisible.

I'm superstitious a little bit.

The Satanic message for this age will be reformation and self-development, while the message of God is regeneration by the power of the spirit.

Any writer takes inspiration from what they read and watch, and over their career works on forming their own voice. I think it was probably Stephen King who made me want to become a writer.

Russia will not soon become, if it ever becomes, a second copy of the United States or England - where liberal value have deep historic roots.