I hate nickels; they're quarter impersonators.

Every cookie is a sugar cookie. A cookie without sugar is a cracker.

No matter what time of year it's always funny when a person walks by me dressed in religious garb and I say Happy Halloween!

Just saw an orthodox Jewish kid do 3 pull-ups on the scaffolding. Shattering the previous record.

Don't go back over your life with a red pen.

Some people hate Jews. Fine, alright it's been done. I mean, that's part of my problem with it. Could you hate somebody new? I'm not giving you any suggestions but the Belgians have had a good run.

The key is to get it all down on paper before the coffee stops telling you you're talented.

Rich people are just like us though they now eat their meals off square shaped plates.

If you are 26 years old and you're waking up under Star Wars sheets... the Force is not with you.

The definition of the word nerd has changed. It's now any attractive person with a hobby. The loneliness component is no longer included.

I sometimes throw in a couple of swears just to keep the Christian right off my tail. I wouldn't want to be the tea party's go-to comedian.

... To be in time means to change.

It is far better to be happy than to have your bodies act as graveyards for animals. Accordingly, the apostle [St.] Matthew partook of seeds, nuts and vegetables, without meat.

Two forces create eternity - a fairy tale and a dream from the fairy tale.

Iran is a major threat to the well-being of Europe and America just as much as it is for the state of Israel.

The only realistic view is that a human life arises gradually, which is not much help in making personal decisions or devising public policy.

Hold your powers together for something good and let everything go that is for you without result and is not suited to you.

I've taught the better class of tourist both to see and not to see; to lift their eyes above and beyond the inessentials, and thrill to our western Nature in her majesty.

I was raised on, 'You go get a nine-to-five job, earn your pay and work your way up.

For Mythology is the handmaid of literature; and literature is one of the best allies of virtue and promoters of happiness.

I think it is important to help our country's image outside of Spain.