I hate writing. I will do anything to avoid it. The only way I could write less was if I was dead.

In real life, I assure you, there is no such thing as algebra.

Think before you speak. Read before you think.

My favorite animal is steak.

The conversational overachiever is someone whose grasp exceeds his reach. This is possible but not attractive.

A hobby is, of course, an abomination, as are all consuming interests and passions that do not lead directly to large, personal gain.

As a teenager you are at the last stage in your life when you will be happy to hear that the phone is for you.

Children are the most desirable opponents at scrabble as they are both easy to beat and fun to cheat.

There are two modes of transport in Los Angeles: car and ambulance. Visitors who wish to remain inconspicuous are advised to choose the latter

I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.

Ask your child what he wants for dinner only if he's buying.

For me to forgive my ex, he would have to sign a marriage contract with his tears and seal it with his blood.

I am sorry, I am not a writer. I simply put my thoughts on paper. Those helped by them call them a book and me a writer. Those who are not helped call it rubbish and me a fool. Both have reason.

Tomorrow is a satire on today And shows its weakness.

Every person is endowed with God-given abilities, and we must cultivate every ounce of talent we have in order to maintain our pinnacle position in the world.

I think Latin American cultures are really rich and fascinating. I like the pomp and circumstance of some of their rituals and ceremonies.

Change is inevitable; but progress depends on what we do with that change.

I believe that it is the responsibility of everyone in corporate life to help with the funding of non-profit organizations.

I grew up in a trailer park in Bellingham, Washington.

I was lucky enough to be a "type." Sort of a bad-guy type at the time, because I was tall and I had dark eyes. A lot of times, you don't have to be good; you just have to be the right type.

We always worry about the wrong things, don't we?