I have a problem, if the light goes on on TV and it blinks midnight, I don't know how to fix it.

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

I always rib people, but nobody ever gives me a hard time. I don't know why. Maybe they're afraid of what I might say. There's probably a lesson in that somewhere, but I don't know what it is.

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

I used to play golf. I wanted to be a better player, but after a while I realized I'd always stink. And that's when I really started to enjoy the game.

Some people say funny things - but I say things funny.

Emotion is the timbre of thought.

A kiss from my mother made me a painter.

I've always had an aversion to debt.

If you're living your life in fear, then you're just not living.

You work for a long period of time and the results don't really show, but at some point everything just comes together and you start to play better, or get more confidence.

I do love secondhand books that open to the page some previous owner read oftenest.

The other day upon the stair, I saw a man who wasn't there. He wasn't there again today; how I wish he'd go away!" ~Gabrielle O'Callaghan towards Adam Black

I've realized the quirky things that make you different are what make you beautiful.

I got a smoke alarm at home, but really it's more like a 9-volt-battery-slowly-drainer.

Man's health and well-being depends upon, among many things, the proper functioning of the myriad proteins that participate in the intricate synergisms of living systems.