I have a question. Is it okay to drink while you're pregnant...if you're planning on giving the baby up for adoption?

Even if times are tough and you're enduring a terrible heartache, it's important to focus your anger on a vibrator, not another person.

There are two kinds of people I don't trust: people who don't drink and people who collect stickers.

I never say the things I really want to. If I did, I'd have no friends.

A hotel room all to myself is my idea of a good time.

One of my girlfriends was getting married. This was becoming an annoying pattern.

I was in a tailspin of confusion I hadn't experienced since the first time I heard George W. Bush speak.

If I had seen pictures of people eating each other on the wall, I would've told him I was into cannibalism.

I don't like to overdose. Call me old-fashioned.

My mother agreed to aid my abuse of alcohol but only if I promised never to tell my newly converted Mormon sister, whose identity I had stolen.

When the time comes for you to leave this earth, if it doesn’t become a lesser place with your absence, then you have wasted your life.

I consider myself a casualty, one of the many casualties of the war on terror.

Only a few find the way, some don't recognize it when they do, somedon't ever want to.

I think weddings are sadder than funerals, because they remind you of your own wedding. You can't be reminded of your own funeral because it hasn't happened. But weddings always make me cry.

I'm from a time and place where bigheadedness was a really savage crime, and you'd get cut down for it by your peers and parents.

We proclaim our commitment to continue to strive for the establishment of lasting world peace.

I just love having little vocal snippets like laughs and coughs, not necessarily stuff that has huge significance, just little human qualities.

It's impossible to be refined when we don't know how to listen.

Self-interest, be it enlightened, works indirectly for the public good.

I am not Mr. Chairman. I am His Excellency, the President of Palestine.