I have a song about how much I hate emojis and the lazy thinking of people who use them. I wish that more people had respect for the English language.

I love drugs, but I hate hangovers, and the hatred of the hangover wins by a landslide every time.

The power of visibility can never be underestimated.

Over half the world menstruates at one time or another, but you'd never know it. Isn't that strange?

Sometimes the only way to deal with horrific things in life is through a dark sense of humor.

Ugly. Is irrelevant. It is an immeasurable insult to a woman, and then supposedly the worst crime you can commit as a woman. But ugly, as beautiful, is an illusion.

Sometimes when we are generous in small, barely detectable ways it can change someone else's life forever.

It's good to be able to laugh at yourself and the problems you face in life. Sense of humor can save you.

Privacy and security are those things you give up when you show the world what makes you extraordinary.

If I'm talking to a guy who's straight and cute and single, I'm like 'are you a unicorn?'

I’m not playing the race card. I’m playing the rice card.

They judged me like they would judge themselves and that's what they could never understand, we are all human but we are not the same.

The idea of always wanting to be the victim in circumstances where you have been offended is a common human trait. Each person wants to be viewed as the aggrieved party.

It’s the beauty that helps us return from the harshness. If it wasn’t there, we would have nothing to live for.

What is greatness? Greatness is when you have found out that you are not great, but everything else is.

The problems seem so easy out there on the stump. Deficits shrink with a rhetorical flourish.

When people ask what's on my iPod, it's the Mormon Tabernacle Choir.

Every year, I resolve to take good care of myself and stay in shape.

Going to rehab was the best decision I ever made.

When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive - to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love ... then make that day count!

Well, obviously I was excited by the idea that Woody Allen was going to direct it. But at the same time, the script itself and the character was really interesting.