I have always had a need for attention but didn't plan to be a comic.

I am very short-sighted, and if I don't like a situation I take my glasses off.

I wouldn't say I was grumpy. It's more pathological - I have seismic tantrums. I get red in the face and cry at least three times a week, and I have to lie down and have a nap afterwards.

People often ask why comedy is harder for women, and the reason is because a tampon will sometimes fall out when you're on stage. Blokes don't have that worry.

Anyone who has dead straight hair wants curls.

I can eat a man, but I'm not sure of the fiber content.

Without fake tan I have the skin tones of a dead jellyfish.

Well, I'm not good with sliminess. I hate the thought of creatures that have slime on them or creatures that leave a slimy trail. At home, the sight of a slug can bring up my breakfast.

I'm a schizophrenic mix of wannabe glamourpuss and absolute slob, and my style is very much magistrate-meets-barmaid.

Well, I really don't like heights. I don't get on the top deck of a double-decker because that's a bit high for me. I always feel that I'm going to hurl myself off, so heights are a problem.

I love fashion, but I don't come from a background of loving clothes, and I remember feeling badly dressed from a young age.

The pursuit of common dreams only produces common results.

Our love has been the thread through thelabyrinth, the net under the high-wire walker, the only real thing in this strange life of mine that I could ever trust.

My great concern is not whether you have failed, but whether you are content with your failure.

The angel personifies something new arising from the deep unconscious.

Jesus didn't come to make us safe. He came to make us dangerous to the kingdom of darkness.

In my experience, desire is desire, love is love. I have never fallen in love with a gender. I have fallen for individuals.

Always accepting the greatest joy of all is the time that I get to spend with my wife.

Death comes suddenly and life is fragile and brief. No one can alter this either by prayers or spells.

Of all the creatures on this planet none is more dangerous than a human being.

DON'T FEAR FAILURE. Fear being successful at things that don't matter