I have no idea where I'm going but here's the real question: What am I doing here in the first place?

The best things in life aren't things.

People who live in glass houses have to wash their windows all the time.

There isn't a child who hasn't gone out into the brave new world who eventually doesn't return to the old homestead carrying a bundle of dirty clothes.

Whether it's the best of times or the worst of times, it's the only time we've got.

The buffalo isn't as dangerous as everyone makes him out to be. Statistics prove that in the United States more Americans are killed in automobile accidents than are killed by buffalo.

You can't make up anything anymore. The world itself is a satire. All you're doing is recording it.

If you attack the establishment long enough and hard enough, they will make you a member of it.

The things that matter most are not things.

This is not an easy time for humorists because the government is far funnier than we are.

I worship the quicksand he [Richard Nixon] walks in.

None fills the void like the company of a true friend.

You won't find me in a romantic comedy. Those movies don't speak to me. People don't come to talk to me about those scripts, because they probably think I'm this dark, twisted, miserable person.

Environmental protection doesn't happen in a vacuum. You can't separate the impact on the environment from the impact on our families and communities.

I grew up working at a record store and listening to vinyl. Even if it's side A and B, there's always this continuity that really turned me on about music.

Cleanliness', chuckled Sir Benjamin, noting his great niece's delighted smile as her eyes rested upon him, 'comes next to godliness, eh, Maria?

My wife has always supported me in my career, even when there were times when it was more sensible to get a job. It has been her confidence in me that has helped enormously.

My nickname is The Fonz. My sister Lori nicknamed me it when I was younger and it stuck.

Great men have the nature of a child.

I wanna smash the faces of those beautiful boys, those Christian boys.