I have two kids in diapers and a cat whose litter box I clean out. I deal with an awful lot of crap.

Statistics don't lie. It's the people who make up the statistics that lie.

I love a good non sequitur.

People try to live their lives without consequences and end up living lives of no consequence.

Man's worst enemies are boredom and discontent.

The universe is a really interesting place. I couldn't live anywhere else.

You can get to everywhere from almost anywhere.

There are no dumb questions, but there are plenty of people who give dumb answers.

When you don't know where you're at, you don't get upset you're not somewhere else.

Man has not forgotten to be man because man has not yet learned to be man! You can’t forget the thing you haven’t learned yet!

When Douglas walked, his mind ran, when he ran, his mind walked.

we're stuck with freedom. we can't push it off on genes.

You'd better do what you feel good about doing. If we [try] to figure out what it is the audience wants and then try to deliver it to them, we're lost souls on the ghost ship forever.

The easiest way to maintain happiness is to lower your expectations of other people and raise them of yourself!

Ask an impertinent question and you are on the way to the pertinent answer.

Be like the cliff against which the waves continually break; but it stands firm and tames the fury of the water around it.

At first Babel longed for the use of just two words: Yes and No. But he knew that just to utter a single word would be to destroy the delicate fluency of silence.

There is nothing like walking to get the feel of a country. A fine landscape is like a piece of music; it must be taken at the right tempo. Even a bicycle goes too fast

My rule is, if it's not moving-monogram it!