I haven't had this much fun since the rats ate my baby sister

The man who smiles when things go wrong has thought of someone to blame it on.

Friendship is like peeing on yourself: everyone can see it, but only you get the warm feeling that it brings.

Despite my ghoulish reputation, I really have the heart of a small boy. I keep it in a jar on my desk.

Sure God created man before woman, but then again you always make a rough draft before creating the final masterpiece.

A foolish man tells a woman to stop talking, but a wise man tells her that her mouth is extremely beautiful when her lips are closed.

I think perhaps all of us go a little crazy at times.

Horror is the removal of masks.

I have the heart of a child. I keep it in a jar on my shelf.

We're all not quite as sane as we pretend to be.

So much for modern science and its wonderful discoveries that just about everything can kill you. Life is only a bedtime story before a long, long sleep.

You who suffer because you love, love still more. To die of love, is to live by it.

Everyone of us has that moment in our life, when you wanted to say NO but say YES even when you know it’s not going in your favor.

Without guidance and support for patients and families approaching death, there may be unnecessary conflict, confusion, and trauma that linger long after the passing of a loved one.

Learning French is trivial: the word for horse is cheval, and everything else follows in the same way.

I always found it satisfying that gravity was described by Einstein's geometric theory of general relativity.

One family--we dwell in Him, One church above, beneath, Though now divided by the stream, The narrow stream of death.

...boredom was as exhausting as backbreaking labor.

The educated do not share a common body of information, but a common state of mind.

I greatly enjoyed Tom Reiss's The Orientalist, for its mingled scholarship and sleuthing, and for so elegantly solving the puzzle of one of the Twentieth Century's most mysterious writers.

The heightened public clamor resulting from radio and television coverage will inevitably result in prejudice. Trial by television is, therefore, foreign to our system.