I just bought a great gift for my boss - a leaky ant farm.

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door

If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door.

If evolution really works, how come mothers only have two hands?

My doctor told me that jogging could add years to my life. I think he was right. I feel ten years older already.

Laughter is an instant vacation.

Anytime a person goes into a delicatessen and orders a pastrami on white bread, somewhere a Jew dies.

The problem with life is, by the time you can read women like a book, your library card has expired.

Laughter is the best medicine in the world.

Marriage is one of the few institutions that allow a man to do as his wife pleases.

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.

God prefers rightousness over peace.

Your mockers will only have your attention only if you give them your attention

When James Wan is out there the horror is real, no doubt about that Check out for own proof if you have guts Sinister 1, 2... Insidious 1, 2...

I am the inferior of any man whose rights I trample under foot. Men are not superior by reason of the accidents of race or color. They are superior who have the best heart — the best brain.

Is France a northern European export powerhouse, or a Mediterranean indebted and dependent economy? Yes to both.

My misdeeds are accidental happenings and merely the result of having been in the wrong bar or bed at the wrong time, say most days between midday and midnight.

The most important question to ask is "What am I becoming?"

Love is the bond between men, the way to teach and the center of the world.

The priests used to say that faith can move mountains, and nobody believed them. Today the scientists say that they can level mountains, and nobody doubts them.

Two women can't share a house comfortably, no matter how fond they might be of each other. It's got to be one woman's kitchen.