I knew I was dog meat. Luckily, I'm the high-priced dog meat that everybody wants. I'm the good-quality dog meat. I'm the Alpo of the NBA.

The Big Cactus... because if you come too close, you're gonna get stuck.

They shot the ball well early. What comes out of the microwave hot doesn't always stay hot. I know, because I eat bagels in the morning.

The stats win nothing. I'm still sexy. I'm still great.

You know, I'm very photogenic.

No one calls me out, I'm from LSU.

I put a lot into it, and when I am done playing, I plan on going undercover and then being the sheriff or chief of police somewhere, either Miami or Orlando, I don't know yet.

I'm not going to try to go out there and outdo him. I don't have to try to outdo him, I'm Shaq.

This summer is going to be a different summer for a lot of people. Everyone is going to take care of their own business and everyone is going to do what's best for them, including me.

I'm going back to the old Shaq. I was normal last year - I was an earthling last summer. I had to go back to my alien roots.

I'm dominant every night. I come in every night and get beat up. I never make a face when they try to flagrant or hack-a-Shaq me, because I'm not from this planet. Earthlings don't faze me.

Life is not a matter for simple optimism--for there is evil

I'm just a giant film fan, so I love action movies out of all kinds of movies. As a film geek, it's amazing to be able to shoot this stuff.

The journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

I love trashy reality TV - all of it.

Unclose your mind. You are not a prisoner. You are a bird in flight, searching the skies for dreams.

Sometimes you're a little too close for comfort, and I think anybody can relate to that, whether you're in college or just moving out on your own.

Normally I object to strangers beaming force fields into my brain.

People [in US] are starting to rethink this idea of empire, this idea of the United States being this superpower, the hegemon, is not working, and we can't afford it anymore.

Novelty in all things is charming.

the more one advances, the more one sees the goal is still far off. And now I am simply resigned to see myself always imperfect and in this I find my joy.