I knew so little about money I used to sign my check, "Love, Rita."

I love being married. It's so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

When I eventually met Mr. Right I had no idea that his first name was Always.

I wonder if other dogs think poodles are members of a weird religious cult.

It wasn't that no one asked me to the prom, it was that no one would tell me where it was.

I was going to have cosmetic surgery until I noticed that the doctor's office was full of portraits by Picasso.

I don't want to push the envelope. Let the envelope stay in the middle of the table. I'll just make you laugh.

I was a ballerina. I had to quit after I injured a groin muscle. It wasn't mine.

In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.

The word 'aerobics' came about when the gym instructors got together and said: If we're going to charge $10 an hour, we can't call it Jumping up and down.

I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and say to myself "well, that's not going to happen

When change loses its magic, then there really isn't anything left to live for.

I don't want to be a memory, I want to be a thought

Humor relieves the tension between what we see or desire but repress in order to sustain a survivable illusion about the world we live in. As such it's always potent stuff, and dangerous.

As in heaven Your will is punctually performed so may it be done on earth by all creatures particularly in me and by me.

The only thing that might have annoyed some mathematicians was the presumption of assuming that maybe the axiom of choice could fail, and that we should look into contrary assumptions.

Good manners reflect something from inside-an innate sense of consideration for others and respect for self.

The Negro revolt is not aimed at winning friends but at winning freedom, not interpersonal warmth but institutional justice.

I'm a big believer in pose some questions and then answer a few of them before you move onto the next set of questions.

There's nothing so useless than executing a task efficiently when it actually never should have been executed at all.

There is nothing sooner overthrows a weak head than opinion by authority, like too strong a liquor for a frail glass.