I learned a long time ago that reality was much weirder than anyone's imagination.

The downward spiral of Dumbness in America is about to hit a new low.

Life has become immeasurably better since I have been forced to stop taking it seriously.

When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro.

Human beings are the only creatures on earth that claim a God and the only thing that behaves like it hasn't got one.

Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whisky and drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love and not getting arrested.

America... just a nation of two hundred million used car salesmen with all the money we need to buy guns and no qualms about killing anybody else in the world who tries to make us uncomfortable.

So we shall let the reader answer this question for himself: who is the happier man, he who has braved the storm of life and lived or he who has stayed securely on shore and merely existed?

Anything that gets your blood racing is probably worth doing.

Hope rises and dreams flicker and die. Love plans for tomorrow and loneliness thinks of yesterday. Life is beautiful and living is pain.

A man who procrastinates in his choosing will inevitably have his choice made for him by circumstance.

Behind every person there lies a story which makes them what they are. Many a time, the story isn’t known to anybody.

That's what's wrong with women. They want you to wait for them until they get ready and then they don't even tell you how they feel.

Do you know, by the way, that German is the only language in the world that has a word for ‘pleasure derived from the misfortune of others’? Schadenfreude.

But Phoebe loved her mother best as she was now, wistful, out-of-step, her laugh tinged always with sadness, as if things were only funny in spite of themselves.

Tell Khan Drogo that he has given me the wind.

Hope – that silly, stupid creature that lived within me, no matter how often I tried to beat it to death – lifted its nose and sniffed at the air.

In early youth as we contemplate our coming life we are like children in a theatre before the curtain is raised sitting there in high spirits and eagerly waiting for the play to begin.

All other forms of history - economic history, social history, psychological history, above all sociology - seem to me history with the history left out.

No moral system can rest solely on authority.

Truly man is a marvelously vain, diverse, and undulating object. It is hard to found any constant and uniform judgment on him.