I'll keep us out of war with Oklahoma!

I even went so far as to become a Southern Baptist for a while, until I realized that they didn't hold 'em under long enough.

Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail.

I admit I was drinking a Guinness... but I did not swallow.

And I think musicians can better run this state than politicians. And, hell, beauticians can better run the state than politicians.

Musicians can run this state better than politicians. We won't get a lot done in the mornings, but we'll work late and be honest.

Poly means more than one, and ticks are bloodsucking parasites.

Well, I just said that Jesus and I were both Jewish and that neither of us ever had a job, we never had a home, we never married and we traveled around the countryside irritating people.

I just want Texas to be number one in something other than executions, toll roads and property taxes.

When a stray animal crosses your path, it may be as close to God as you're going to get in this lifetime.

People may surprise you with unexpected kindness. Dogs have a depth of loyalty that often we seem unworthy of. But the love of a cat is a blessing, a privilege in this world.

The timeless in you is aware of life's timelessness. And knows that yesterday is but today's memory and tomorrow is today's dream.

Guard your heart in your spirit.

The hunger for attention is an enemy of self-love.

Beware the unbelief of others. It's contagious!

I've made peace with myself.Good for you. That's the hardest war of all to win.Didn't say I won. Just stopped fighting.

The time will come when the Negro in the South will be accorded all the political rights which his ability, character, and material possessions entitle him to.

I always wanted to be Gene Hackman and I always wanted to be, you know... I wanted to be one of these guys. I always wanted to be Bob Duvall.

Getting out of one car and getting into another

What have you got if you do not have a peaceful corner where you can refresh yourself?

Anything that makes us forget who we are and what we want; that way we can work in order to produce, reproduce, and earn money.