I looked down at the chessboard. The move with the knight was wrong. I put it back where I had moved it from. Knights had no meaning in this game. It wasn't a game for knights.

When I split an infinitive, God damn it, I split it so it stays split.

Down these mean streets a man must go who is neither tarnished nor afraid

He looked about as inconspicuous as a tarantula on a slice of angel food.

Some are able and humane men and some are low-grade individuals with the morals of a goat, the artistic integrity of a slot machine, and the manners of a floorwalker with delusions of grandeur.

It was a blonde. A blonde to make a bishop kick a hole in a stained-glass window.

There are two kinds of truth; The truth that lights the way and the truth that warms the heart. The fist of these is science and the second is art.

It seemed like a nice neighborhood to have bad habits in.

The challenge of screenwriting is to say much in little and then take half of that little out and still preserve an effect of leisure and natural movement

At least half the mystery novels published violate the law that the solution, once revealed, must seem to be inevitable.

Chess is as elaborate a waste of human intelligence as you can find outside an advertising agency.

Why should our nastiness be the baggage of an apish past and our kindness uniquely human? Why should we not seek continuity with other animals for our 'noble' traits as well?

Love is a rare and precious thing. Squander it at your peril.

From there to here, and here to there, funny things are everywhere.

We failed, but in the good providence of God apparent failure often proves a blessing.

We are entertainers. We have to give our audience a good time. If my name serves that purpose, if that brings a smile on your face, then I think it is good and my job has been done.

Believe only half of the praise and half of the criticism.

Parking at a garage is like going to a prostitute. Why pay for it when you can apply yourself, and then may be you can get it for free.

Things couldn't stay the same forever.

Transition begins in forgiveness.

Thou ever young, fresh, lov'd, and delicate wooer, whose blush doth thaw the consecrated snow