I lost my mind. I lunged at him and inhaled all of his fries standing up a foot away from the trash can. No food is as delicious as food you eat standing a foot away from a trash can. Ask any possum.

If you believe in yourself and work hard, your dreams will come true

If you believe in yourself and work hard, your dreams will come

If you've got it, flaunt it. And if you don't got it? Flaunt it. 'Cause what are we even doing here if we're not flaunting it?

I am the kind of person who, if my feelings are unrequited, can completely detach from someone emotionally if I simply put my mind to it.

What I didn't need was some hot-and-cold long-distance flake wasting my time. It hurt my feelings and made me feel like something was wrong with me.

I'm the kind of person who becomes silent when I get scared, because I hope Death will not notice me if I am very still and very quiet. It has worked well so far.

There is a certain type of greasy hair that you get only when you are writing with no breaks.

Just bear a passing resemblance to a fictional romantic trope I like and I will love you forever. We're all just trying to find the Mark Darcy of our workplace, aren't we?

I don’t really like organizations where people are “deemed” things.

But every tomorrow has led to today— to us being alone, hungry, and cold on an unknown island somewhere in the South Pacific.

The great human problem of evil stems from the illusion of separateness. Whenever this illusion is overcome, we behave lovingly to one another.

Much is said about the burdens and responsibilities of married men. Responsibilities indeed there are, if they but felt them: but as to burdens what are they?

We talk too much, love too seldom, and hate too often.

When a crow says an intelligent thing, chickens may laugh at it. This is the laughing of the sand castles at the powerful waves!

I have a pathological fear of getting my picture taken.

The drums have hogged a lot of the credit. We're as much -- or more -- *cymbal* players, as we are drummers.

The choice in politics isn't usually between black and white. It's between two horrible shades of gray.

Dull November brings the blast, Then the leaves are whirling fast.

I am The Game and I am that damn good!