I love my own coincidences and love to hear other peoples' stories.

There's so much comedy on television. Does that cause comedy in the streets?

If your parents never had children, chances are... neither will you.

As long as people will accept crap, it will be financially profitable to dispense it.

Censorship feeds the dirty mind more than the four-letter word itself.

It's a rare person who wants to hear what he doesn't want to hear.

I don't see the future as bright, language-wise. I see it as a glass half empty - and evaporating quickly.

I eat at this German-Chinese restaurant and the food is delicious. The only problem is that an hour later you're hungry for power.

I don't feel old. I feel like a young man that has something wrong with him.

Obviously those who burn to be professional jesters mean that they want to be successful comedians. And those are always an elite, microscopic portion of the population. But oh, how they try.

My IQ is somewhere between Spiro Agnew's and Albert Einstein's.

I don't want a man around, what use are they except for ten seconds' worth of half babies

Connect and communicate!

When good Americans die, they go to Paris, ' the ghost said, after taking a drag on a small cigarette.

And I'm not an actress. I don't think I am an actress. I think I've created a brand and a business.

The Peacekeepers had a tradition that every problem had a solution. It was a nice slogan. Wasn't true, but it sounded good.

I always thought of myself as some sort of athlete until I started playing golf a couple years ago.

Dream as big as you can dream, and anything is possible.

We must move "out of our mind" and dwell in our consciousness.

The cyclone derives its powers from a calm center. So does a person.

The principle of faith is as firm as the very pillars of heaven.