I'm a big fan of pastries the size of a baby that contain enough calories for a year. That seems like an effective use of time.

I used to think I was a little unstable, and then I met every girl I've ever dated.

Saturday night is perfect for writers because other people have "plans.

What I really need is a woman who loves me for my money but doesn't understand math.

The key to eating healthy is not eating any food that has a TV commercial.

Falling in love is a completely transcendent experience. It's like eating pizza-flavored ice cream

Dopamine is a chemical released in your brain and your body when you sleep that paralyzes your body so you don't act out your dreams.

The one thing you're most reluctant to tell. That's where the comedy is.

I love pizza so much, I would marry pizza, but it would just be an elaborate ploy to eat her whole family at the reception.

Creepy people do the things that decent people want to do, but have decided are not a great idea.

It was a hard name having growing up as a child. Some kids would call me names like "Birbiglebug" and "Birbibliography" and "Faggot". Some were more clever than others.

Darkness was my best friend and loneliness my soulmate.

It's not funny anymore...", did you heard your self, you are entering a position called, "I wanna be a victim..., please take me".

So many of my rookie mistakes could have been avoided by first-hand exposure to other, more experienced technology entrepreneurs.

There is a certain tendency on the part of some Americans to treat the UN as a multilateralism à la carte where you pick and choose where it suits you and when it doesn't suit you, you pull back.

Now I'm a pretty lazy person and am prepared to work quite hard in order to avoid work.

Human beliefs, like all other natural growths, elude the barrier of systems.

I don't listen to music when I write. I need silence so I can hear the sound of the words.

The ABA works tirelessly in its efforts involving the first line of defense: the prevention of burn injuries.

Whatever the method, the purpose of quieting the mind is always the same... to step out of you own way and touch a Universal Oneness with all things.

Once you'd broken through that invisible barrier that separates one person from another, you were connected forever, whether you liked it or not.