I'm also not good with numbers either, so it's not a great mix. People apparently don't want you ball-parkin' it when it comes to their finances.

Now remember kids if anyone ever offers you drugs say 'Thank you' cause drugs are very expensive.

Stop saying you're not racist because you have a friend that's black. That's like saying you're not a pedophile because you have a friend that's a kid.

I have voices in my head, but they're all speaking Spanish, and I have NO idea what they're saying.

I'll tell you what's better than watching the sunrise... Sleeping through it.

I dated a teacher in high school. Yeah, it didn't make me cooler. And a lot of you are like 'that's cause you were homeschooled'.

Girls say it's hard to find nice guys. It's actually really easy. It's just all nice guys are ugly.

The flat-brimmed cap is the modern day dunce cap.

They say money doesn't buy happiness. That phrase should end with 'just kidding'.

Being an ugly woman is like being a man. You're gonna have to work. Yep.

I do think we can be a little less PC when it comes to sports, though. Just once I want to hear an announcer go 'God, black people are fast. Holy cow! All of them. They're fast. Back to you Bob.'

Eyes are my best friend and I trust them, cuz they never lie to me

Condoms aren't completely safe. A friend of mine was wearing one . . . and got hit by a bus.

The interdependent couple is the new setting and their knowledge of Self is an ancient treasure."-Serena Jade

We have entered, almost without noticing, an age of exploration and discovery unparalleled since the Renaissance.

B.O.Y. means ‘Beware of You’… Be aware of your power. We have the choice to live positively or in our own destruction.

That consciousness of quality, and the need to demand it can galvanize your energies, not just in your work, but in a rigorous exercise of mind and heart in every aspect of your life.

Casanova, he had no money and no power, and according to some, he even was cute. But he had talent to live, and some literature talent. I love how he invented himself.

I do all the work so it's only right that I should get the most money. Plus I am the most handsome.

The Goldilocks Enigma is the idea that everything in the universe is just right for life, like the porridge in the fairy tale.

Though bachelors be the strongest stakes, married men are the best binders, in the hedge of the commonwealth.