I'm always amazed when I hear people saying, "That George Bush, he's a great leader". And I wonder, where can one find a drug that would make one so delusional?

All the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911.

MTV is to music as KFC is to chicken!

I like coffee because it gives me the illusion that I might be awake.

There's no such thing as soy milk. It's soy juice.

Donald Trump came out as a birther, which is Republican for, 'I'm running for president.'

Elected officials shouldn’t get to choose who gets to choose elected officials.

If a group of people - leaders - can convince a group of folk who barely have a pot to piss in that the rich shouldn't be taxed-- THAT is leadership!

When it comes to idiots, America's got more than its fair share. If idiots were energy, it would be a source that would never run out.

You can never put too much pork in your mouth as far as I'm concerned.

What I find most disturbing about Valentine's Day is, look, I get that you have to have a holiday of love, but in the height of flu season, it makes no sense.

It was in the words he didn't say... that I found all the answers to my questions.

Any failure we could suffer throughout our lives, will turn into little successes if we take the right path, keep walking.

The more mistakes I make, the less I judge other people's mistakes

If I want to run around a field when I'm 70, I would like to have that option.

The future is not to be forecast, but created.

It is loving the Cross that one finds one heart, for Divine Love cannot live without suffering.

If you're feminist, it means that you've noticed that male ownership of the direction of female lives has been the order of the day for a few thousand years, and it isn't natural.

She had the kind of eyes that predisposed you to supporting her every endeavor.

Certainly, I, as an audience, am stricken with terror if I see only two people onstage. And one person, I think, is even harder for people to take.