I'm always making fun of myself and my friends.

There's always something funny about men chasing women.

You can either look at things in a brutal, truthful way that's depressing, or you can screw around and have fun.

Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.

You know the drill. 18 is legal. 17 with consent. 16 with a note. 15 if her dad's in the room. Low five!

I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.

I just don't like to go out and deal with the real world. It's scary.

Staying in a hotel this time. They put me up in a little bit of a shithole. Yeah. Just this side of rinky dink. The first 7 floors are a homeless shelter, but I'm on 8.

Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality; it can devour entire city's. I prefer keeping my eyes wide open.

I want to get back to my fighting weight of 98 pounds. I have the exact measurements of that guy from the movie, Powder. Right now, I am the reigning West Coast Powder.

My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.

When you recognize and reflect on even one good thing about yourself, you are building a bridge to a place of kindness and caring.

Gratitude is the heart's first language.

Cuddle up. Rain always stops. It always stops. It always does. -The Brown Cape

Courage that grows from constitution often forsakes a man when he has occasion for it courage which arises from a sense of duty acts in a uniform manner.

No one can be profoundly original who does not avoid eccentricity.

When we meet real tragedy in life, we can react in two ways - either by losing hope and falling into self-destructive habits, or by using the challenge to find our inner strength.

Any nation that allows the government to dominate its monetary and economic policies will ultimately suffer grave consequences.

I go to bed is around 11, and I do that for every race. I get good sleep. I don't lie awake for any race. That's my routine.

What I like are films that take me seriously, that don't treat me as more stupid than I am.

In the service of Caesar, everything is legitimate.