I'm at an age when my back goes out more than I do.

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

It is easy for anybody to call himself or herself a “Christian” but the truth is we respond from very different world-views

A true friend fills our lives with the aroma of love.

Work is the most nourishing thing so far in my life.

In LA, I live on sushi or salad.

The symphony orchestra had played poorly, so the conductor was in a bad mood. That night he beat his wife--because the music hadn't been beautiful enough.

As I'm writing it, I'm kind of curious to see what's going to happen. It almost feels like I'm the writer and I'm the listener, too.

Nobody stays special when they're old, Anna. That's what we have to learn.

In science consensus is irrelevant. What is relevant is reproducible results.

I think that's the hardest part for an artist is finding their voice and learning how to write, finding what they have to say that is unique.

There's not one cast member of 90210 who didn't throw a tantrum to two themselves.