I'm doing stuff on Kaballah and Scientology and a little bit more racial stuff, for good measure.

Your inability to see yourself clearly is what's keeping you alive.

I looked up and saw the shape of a heart made by the silhouette of Ben Affleck and Matt Damon kissing.

We need to stop telling girls they can be anything they want when they grow up. Because it would have never occurred to them that they couldn't.

I do love poop. I can't help it. The heart wants what it wants. I enjoy being clever and pithy and political, but nothing's going to get me like dumb stuff.

People are always introducing me as Sarah Silverman, Jewish comedienne. I hate that! I wish people would see me for who I really am — I'm white!

Jews, black people - any people who are hated or who have suffered, either as individuals or as a people - use humour. It is a survival skill.

I hope the Jews did kill Christ, I'd do it again in a second.

Drew Friedman isn't just a brilliant artist. He takes you to a place. He takes you back in time. He makes you smell the stale cigarettes and cold brisket and you say, thank you for the pleasure.

They've got great parents; I'm just trying to be the fun uncle.

I like talking about things that are taboo, because it makes them not taboo anymore.

This is the very ecstasy of love, Whose violent property fordoes itselfAnd leads the will to desperate undertakingsAs oft as any passion under heavenThat does afflict our natures.

Past glories are poor feeding.

The worst outcome of not trying is never getting to fail.

When one loves somebody everything is clear - where to go what to do - it all takes care of itself and one doesn't have to ask anybody about anything.

What are the odds and did you know what's really happening around us!?

I grew up in Minnesota, where we treasure our tradition of civic engagement - and our record of having the nation's highest voter participation.

Only powerfully conceived images have the ability to penetrate the memory, to stay there, in short to become unforgettable.

Our grocery store now has self-checkout, for your convenience. It's like getting punched in the throat, for your comfort.

If you don't get result-oriented with the kids, you can focus on the things in the process that are important to them being successful.

Someone had my number and they started text-stalking me. I've never replied to them. It was tempting to write back, but I resisted.