I'm either mentally ill or Jewish. I can't sometimes tell the difference.

The thing women have yet to learn is nobody gives you power. You just take it.

Women complain about PMS, but I think of it as the only time of the month when I can be myself.

I'm not going to vacuum 'til Sears makes one you can ride on.

Excuse the mess but we live here.

As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job.

Half the world's starving; the other half is trying to lose weight.

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with.

I call myself a 'domestic goddess.

Experts say you should never hit your children in anger. When is a good time? When you're feeling festive?

I quit smoking. I feel better. I smell better. And it's safer to drink out of old beer cans laying around the house.

You always know the truth, because when you cut yourself or someone else with it, there’s always a bloody show.

A Soul Mate offers an invitation to fall in love with yourself, so that you are able to open your heart to another. Do you dare?

For our kind, death is only the beginning.

It's no accident that my first novel was called Americana. This was a private declaration of independence, a statement of my intention to use the whole picture, the whole culture.

I was sleeping the other night, alone, thanks to the exterminator.

Keep calm and pass me the ball.

We have a country, we have to have a border.

I moved to cricket at a time when I was at the peak of my career, and I can guarantee you that no one else from Bollywood would have done that.

Real chessplayers think about chess more or less 24 hours a day. It is a passion and a fate that one has to live with - and it lasts a lifetime.

I was born to join in love, not hate - that is my nature.