I'm from such an old family, it's been condemned.

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

If you don't have wrinkles, you haven't laughed enough.

Whatever you may look like, marry a man your own age - as your beauty fades, so will his eyesight.

I've tried Buddhism, Scientology, Numerology, Transcendental Meditation, Qabbala, t'ai chi, feng shui and Deepak Chopra but I find straight gin works best.

Housework can't kill you, but why take a chance?

The reason women don't play football is because 11 of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Maybe it's true that life begins at fifty. But everything else starts to wear out, fall out, or spread out.

My cooking is so bad my kids thought Thanksgiving was to commemorate Pearl Harbor.

To serve others is not only by hands but by mouth as well.

The job of the United Nations is to grow more flowers, more smiles and more beauty on the earth. Once effect is created, cause will follow,

Everyone wants to feel like they could destroy a small-to-medium-to-large part of someone who loves them.

Man is a logical machine run by the scoundrels of emotions.

What boundary ever set limits to the service of mankind?

What is written beneath this heavy handsome book cover will count, so sayeth this cover.

One must fight to get to the top, especially if one starts at the bottom.

My mind is very clear, but my heart is unable to understand.

Gratefulness is a payment everyone can afford.

I'm accepting I'm not living that younger, dreamed version of myself in the big city.