I'm happy to start on one topic and end on another one entirely, as long as it's funny.

You should definitely visit the Louvre, a world-famous art museum where you can view, at close range, the backs of thousands of other tourists trying to see the Mona Lisa.

Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

A person who is nice to you, but rude to the waiter, is not a nice person.

Never be afraid to try something new. Remember that a lone amateur built the Ark. A large group of professionals built the Titanic.

Eating rice cakes is like chewing on a foam coffee cup, only less filling.

It is a scientific fact that your body will not absorb cholesterol if you take it from another person's plate.

Sharks are as tough as those football fans who take their shirts off during games in Chicago in January, only more intelligent.

The problem with writing about religion is that you run the risk of offending sincerely religious people, and then they come after you with machetes.

Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once.

Thus the metric system did not really catch on in the States, unless you count the increasing popularity of the nine-millimeter bullet.

But this revolutionary act of treating ourselves tenderly can begin to undo the aversive messages of a lifetime.

Ordinary men with extraordinary powerCommon men with uncommon resultsUsual men with unusual anointingUnschooled mortal men with immortal visionWeak men with mighty deeds-Insight for Fruitful Living

Listen to your conscience. You have to live with yourself for the rest of your life.

My 'people skills' are 'rusty.' Pardon me but I have spent the last year as a multidimensional wavelength of celestial intent.

New Yorkers are predatory about real estate. When they sense softening, they move in for the kill.

Don't write about a character. Become that character, and then write your story.

We do have the nuclear weapons agreement with Iran, that's an enforcement consequence, action for action, follow on. We have a plan, we will watch them, we will be vigilant.

We can guess that the unacceptable conduct of the soldiers at Abu Ghraib resulted in part from the dangerous state of affairs on the ground in a theater of war.

An independant reality in the ordinary physical sense can neither be ascribed to the phenomenon nor to the agencies of observation.