I'm in the middle of my sixth book, which is about animals at the Los Angeles Zoo.

People forget the good that zoos do. If it weren't for zoos, we would have so many species that would be extinct today.

If the guy's a cutie, you've gotta tap that booty.

I'm a teenager trapped in an old body.

I may be a senior, but so what? I'm still hot.

Facebook just sounds like a drag, in my day seeing pictures of peoples vacations was considered a punishment

Keep the other person's well being in mind when you feel an attack of soul-purging truth coming on.

If one has no sense of humor, one is in trouble.

Get at least 8 hours of beauty sleep. 9 if you're ugly.

We didn’t have Facebook in my day, we had a phone book but you wouldn’t waste an afternoon on it

I don't know how people get so anti-something. Just mind your own business, take care of your own affairs, and don't worry about other people so much.

True humility is not thinking less of yourself

To talk of diseases is a sort of Arabian Nights entertainment.

I just want to repeat that there's nothing that we've proposed that would make it harder for you to purchase a firearm.

I'm no longer afraid of conflict, and I don't think conflict is a bad thing.

Truth is too weak to combat prejudice.

The propaganda machine keeps on churning out lies and deceit. And the obedient, unthinking, apathetic people in our society keep accepting it.

Fluency in English is something that I'm often not accused of.

Nostalgia is, 'Hey, remember the other mall that used to be there?'

Good impulses are naught, unless they become good actions.

There's no one so self-righteous as someone policing someone else's morality.