I'm kind of surprised that so many of those other books were almost exactly like mine. They even follow the form. There were some books that even copied the stamp. It shows so little imagination.

Theres some kind of dark symbiosis between lunatics and the Postal Service.

I never thought I'd be a writer. I never thought I'd be able to read a book, let alone write one. So if books like this inspire kids to write, or even read a whole book, I think it's good.

Tommy Smothers is my longest mentor, and Dave Eggers is my youngest.

Remember, no one can design your life, only you can do that.

If I don't see the reason of someone being my friend, chances are, we are just floating and I need a ship to set sail.

It wasn't until I worked in the Perth Hospital kitchen in the 1970s that I began hearing stories about the ghosts that haunted their halls at night.

It is only in the morning that one should marry, read unfavourable reviews, make one's will, beat one's servants, and so forth.

Never be friends with your exes if you weren't friends with them before.

Now very often events are set up for photographers... The weddings are orchestrated about the photographers taking the picture, because if it hasn't been photographed it doesn't really exist.

The unbosoming oneself to another is a kind of release to the soul, which strives to lighten its burden and find ease by throwing off the weight that lay heavy upon it.

Nice guys finish first. If you don't know that, then you don't know where the finish line is.

My friends ask me for advice about guys, because I have so many brothers and I see what guys go through.

It's not the plot [of Valley of Violence] - the plot is the reason to get all these things to happen, all these character moments to happen. It was always meant to have these two perspectives.