I'm like a Dilbert cartoon.

There's always something funny about men chasing women.

You can either look at things in a brutal, truthful way that's depressing, or you can screw around and have fun.

Whenever you get on the plane, the flight attendant will always tell you the name of your pilot. Like anyone goes, Oh, he's good.

You know the drill. 18 is legal. 17 with consent. 16 with a note. 15 if her dad's in the room. Low five!

I'm a gentleman and I was always taught it's rude, to talk about a woman's age or weight unless you are breaking up with her.

I just don't like to go out and deal with the real world. It's scary.

Staying in a hotel this time. They put me up in a little bit of a shithole. Yeah. Just this side of rinky dink. The first 7 floors are a homeless shelter, but I'm on 8.

Gossip is a plague that consumes weak, gullible people and blinds them from the truth of reality; it can devour entire city's. I prefer keeping my eyes wide open.

I want to get back to my fighting weight of 98 pounds. I have the exact measurements of that guy from the movie, Powder. Right now, I am the reigning West Coast Powder.

My fellow nerds and I will retire to the nerdery with our calculators.

Unfortunately a lot of people in the world live almost unconsciously

Beauty without expression is boring.

I love you not because you're beautiful, but its through You that I discover more of myself!

ARE YOU A MOVIE STAR?Prerequisite for Laziness: Creativity, award winning actor/actress, convincing speech

There came a time when you realised that moving on was pointless. That you took yourself with you wherever you went.

I am god...to the dislexic segment of the population.

If we can refrain from harming others in our actions & words, we can start to give serious attention to actively doing good.

A proof only becomes a proof after the social act of "accepting it as a proof".

Audiences just naturally hate me on screen. I could play a role in a tuxedo and people would think I was rotten. You can do much more with a villain part.

And Chris Benoit, as magnificent as he looks, is not medically cleared yet.